BEYOND SCARCITY: INTRODUCING A NEW CONVERSATION
“It is not the lack of love, but the lack of trust that makes relationships fragile.” – African Proverb
How does poverty trauma affect our most intimate relationships?
This Women’s Month, DBSA invites you into a new conversation. One we’ve carried in silence for generations — but never named.
We call it: Poverty Trauma.
It’s not just about income or possessions.
It’s about the invisible weight of survival thinking.
How it shapes the way we love, lead, connect, and carry each other — and ourselves.
- How poverty trauma affects intimacy
When your nervous system is trained to expect scarcity — of love, money, safety, time — you may begin to confuse control with care, or silence with protection. You may overgive just to feel enough. You may hold back to avoid disappointment. You may numb yourself to avoid shame.
Poverty trauma affects romantic partnerships, parenting, caregiving, and friendships. It erodes communication, dissolves emotional safety, and feeds cycles of stress and blame.
And still, you keep trying.
Because love matters.
Even if no one taught you how to receive it without fear.
- What happened to the glue that held families together?
Across South Africa — and beyond — women are the weavers of families.
They are the ones who cook, carry, check in, cover school fees, lead prayers, and hold memories.
But trauma takes its toll. Especially the long-term, historical kind.
This year, we pause to ask how poverty trauma affects not just individual hearts, but whole generations.
On 12 August, we observe International Youth Day and World Elephant Day — honouring young leaders and wise matriarchs. What wisdom is being lost in the silence between generations?
On 19 August, we mark World Senior Citizens Day — a time to reflect on the role of older people in our lives. How many are isolated, unsupported, or forgotten, despite once being the centre of the home?
And on 30 August, The International Day of Victims of Enforced Disappearances reminds us that not all disappearances are physical.
Some are emotional.
Some are relational.
Some are passed down.
- What is poverty trauma?
It is the internalised experience of chronic lack.
Of being cut off — from resources, safety, voice, dignity, joy.
And over time, it becomes normalised.
Expected.
Just “how life is.”
But here’s the truth: poverty trauma is not your fault.
It’s a response to larger systems — colonialism, apartheid, patriarchy, global conflict — all of which teach us that struggle is natural, and joy must be earned.
We disagree.
Healing is your birthright.
Joy is your inheritance.
Love is your language — not fear.
🧡 You are not broken.
You are responding to a world that taught you to survive instead of thrive.
But survival is not your final form.
In the first weekly post on Monday, 4 August, we’ll talk about courage — the kind that lives in your chest and roars through your belly.
Inspired by International Assistance Dog Day, we ask:
What does leadership look like when it comes from instinct, not fear?
And what happens when a woman’s heart roars like a lion?